condolences for the stars

michael jackson, for me, a star, his death, shock for me, juz oni shock, until i heard a song, duno wat name le, feel very warm, then i cry for him le... haizz... u can say my tears not valuable, bcoz i can tears for anyone at anytime, anyway, pray for him, hope he is well in other place...

erm... when my time is finish in this world, i wil leave quietly, at least for now, i think like tat, but in the future time, this thought mostly wil change, bcoz i wiil tel my spouse, the oni one, i wish to go earlier than him, bcoz i m a selfish person, i cant afford the painful of the lost, but it is stil early saying for the time, mayb the thought til change in the future, who know? but i know its hardly to..

原来不是这样的

我看的，全部都不是真的，对我好，骗我的，而我却傻傻的受骗，一次又一次的把我丢下，我真的忍无可忍，一次又一次的原谅你，我真的忍不了，我需要离开，就这样了……

正常的一天

原来不寻常已经是我面对的每一天，今天超乎的正常，希望明天也一样，大后天也一样，天天都一样，把我拉回正轨……

快乐，不见了

你来了又走，来到时，停留不久，别人说快乐其实很简单，以前我也认为如此，当五月天的“你不是真正的快乐”出的时候，发觉快乐有时很难，有时也很简单，但是现在很难，觉得快乐离我很远很远，不要说真正的快乐，这一秒，你觉得很快乐，下一秒，它就不见了。中间人一点都不好做，这道理，明白了很久，但是，这次我逃不掉，不能逃，两边都有道理，有时会为任何一边心痛，痛很久，很辛苦啊，就来撑不住了，为什么会这样？我到底做错什么了？要这样来折磨我，很想就这样离开，期望有不让我掉泪的一天……

conflict

wat hard work return?? ntg... really disappointed tis time, wat i do are all useless, can b ignore for one minute, even cant stand for one second, juz get the painful lesson... no idea wat shuld i do le, shuld i cont?? yea, i shuld, i hv to continue, if not it wont hv anyone to do tat... although really wan to run, wan to escape, can i? do i? cant, emotional for once at a moment, or one hr is too long, i oni hv 1 min, duno when i can sustain all those things, hope i wont fall tat easily..

will or have to

sometimes when we deal with some situation, we have to do this n that
sometimes oso, when we deal with it, we will do this n tat
will to means we hv choices?? then have to means we oni hv one road in front of us, no turning bec?? when u deal with have to, wat will u do?? deal with hv to so many times, it wil reveal the world is more crucial then v think of, the more u hv no choices, then u know that is is darker outside, it is normally to ppl, when v understress, v c the world is very dark, but when v r not in depressed area, v feel like tis world is full of hoping, but when u feel darker b4, n now u r in the sunny, will u feel that dark wont cum again?? basically i believe in this oso, but situation make me change, one month time, heaven to hell and wont go bec to heaven again, something i used to believe it is right but now no more, pls forgv me not to mention it, bcoz whenever i get to there again, i feel it is very dirty, n everywhere oso so dark, mayb have some light in btwn, but then i din c it....